Thursday, December 31, 2009

Self Help Mantra - Principles of Life - Part 3

A Reminder of the Principles of Life

11: Love responds- fear reacts. Love connects- fear separates. Love uplifts- fear deflates. Love creates- fear destroys.

12: There is no such thing as a mistake- only experience. There is no such thing as failure - only people's condemnation. There is no such thing as success- only people's approval. Let life live through you.

13: Do not get caught up in modifying your life, allow life to change YOU. Modification is a superficial exterior veneer, change is an inner shift in consciousness.

14: Pain is a measure of your resistance to change.

15: Decide whether you want to be an onlooker of life or a participant. This is the birthplace of choice.

To Be Continued.....

~ Unknown Author

Wednesday, December 30, 2009

Self Help Mantra - Principles of Life - Part 2

A Reminder of the Principles of Life

6: Becoming free is not changing yourself into someone you think you should be. Becoming free is falling in love with who you are- right now.

7: Imagine a room of pitch dark and a room of bright light connected by a door. When you open the door what happens? Light floods into the dark room, illuminating it. Live accordingly, think thoughts of light.

8: F.E.A.R- False Evidence Appearing Real

9: Anything of the past that is unresolved is unresolved now. Living NOW resolves the past.

10: Life flows from the inside out, never the reverse. Understand this and you cease to be a victim.

To Be Continued....

~ Unknown Author

Tuesday, December 29, 2009

Self Help Mantra - Principles of Life - Part 1

A Reminder of the Principles of Life

1: Life does not work through indecision. Indecision promotes blocks, confusion and stress. Make a decision and allow life to find movement through you. Trust yourself.

2: The 3 C's of life are Courage, Capacity and Commitment. It takes Courage and a commitment to make many of life's decisions, and capacity to follow them through. The 3 C's of a successful relationship are Caring, Consideration and Communication. Communication opens the door between us, consideration allows us to pass through it and our ability to care for each other unites us.

3: Truth is not truth out of timing- yet it remains truth. We are the timing to recognize truth.

4: The mind recoils from the unknown, so we seek to make everything known, and, thus sage. Imagination is the key to the unknown- positive, uplifting imagination.

5: For as long as we search for Our God Self, we deny that we are it. Loving your self reveals your truth.

To Be Continued...

~ Unknown Author

Monday, December 28, 2009

Self Help Mantra For Self Esteem

Recognising and tackling SELF-ESTEEM

Low self-esteem is known to be the ‘core’ of psychological problems. Here are ways to identify and tackle this menace.

Low self-esteem and lack of confidence can hold us back from achieving many things. It can also be detrimental to our physical and emotional well-being. The level of our self-esteem has profound consequences on every aspect of our existence – how we operate in our workplace, how we deal with people, how high we are likely to rise and how much we are likely to achieve.

The reasons of low self-esteem often begins during childhood. Even the most confident of adolescents can grow up to experience low self-esteem and start to feel unworthy. Adult life can be tough and it can sometimes feel like the ‘survival of the fittest’ and we’re all, at some point, going to bump into people who will try to belittle us.

Low self-esteem is best described as having a low opinion of oneself (either consciously or subconsciously), and feelings of being ‘worthless’. Yet the subject has not received the kind of attention that it deserves. Unless our self-esteem plummets to the extent that we can no longer handle our lives effectively.


• General lack of participation
• Negative responses to questions
• Sluggish physical behaviour
• Excessive use of activities for escapism (TV, videos, internet, reading). Be careful of
over-analysing here as this alone is not an indicator
• Aggressive or argumentative behaviour
• Indecisiveness
• Unwillingness to try anything new (anything from new food through to goal setting)
• Inability to say no (need to be liked/loved by others by saying yes)
• Need to prove self-worth and ‘status’ by boasting, making public claims about capabilities
• Low self-esteem has been correlated with low life satisfaction, loneliness, anxiety,
resentment, irritability and depression.

Thursday, December 24, 2009

Self Help Mantra For Building Trust

Trust is so fragile that is hard to put back to its original state when broken.

These simple tips on How to build Trust is dedicated to kids and their parents as well.

Tips How To Build Trust :

  • Never tell a lie, always tell the truth. And, say it kindly and tactfully.

  • Be real, do not act like somebody you are not.

  • Do not gossip about other people’s life. The one you are talking to may think you are gossiping
    her at her back. The worst scene is – if she pass what you said to other people too.

  • Never betray a confidence. Do not tell the secrets confided to you.

  • Keep all the promises you made. If you cannot keep a promise, better not to promise at all.

  • When you borrow something, always return it as soon as possible.

Monday, December 21, 2009

Self Help - Improve Self-Esteem & Boost Confidence


1) Accept Yourself
Firstly, you need to become more accepting of yourself and realise that nobody is perfect and that we all make mistakes from time to time and that this is natural and perfectly acceptable.

2) Recognise your talents
Another method of boosting self-confidence is to recognise talents, abilities and good qualities. Constantly remind ourselves of these and to give ourselves a pat on the back whenever we are able to utilise those abilities and qualities for the benefit of ourselves and others.

3) Embrace challenges
Never shy away from risks. You can end up stifling your own personal development and become more afraid to take risks if you perpetually do the same thing over and over again because it’s something you know that works. Life is an evolutionary process and things change all the time. For you to become confident, it’s crucial that you try out new experiences and embrace challenges and risks and see them as an opportunity for growth as opposed to something to be frightened of.

4) Never compare
Don’t judge yourself by competing with others. Everyone’s different. Some of us can jump higher than others, some of us can spell better but it’s important that we only aspire to do and to be the best that we can and not to compare ourselves with the achievements of others.

5) Consult a physician
If the above techniques do not seem to work, then see a counsellor or a physician who can guide on further treatment. Low self-esteem if untreated can lead to psychological problems too. With counselling sessions and homeopathic treatment, anyone can be treated from skin allergy but can regained their self esteem.

Friday, December 18, 2009

Self Help - Hoteling Tips - Part 2

13 Things Your Waiter Won't Tell You

7. Don't order meals that aren't on the menu. You're forcing the chef to cook something he doesn't make on a regular basis. If he makes the same entrance 10,000 times a month, the odds are good that the dish will be a home run every time.

8. Splitting entrances is okay, but don't ask for water, lemon, and sugar so you can make your own lemonade. What's next, grapes so you can press your own wine?

9. If you find a waiter you like, always ask to be seated in his or her section. Tell all your friends so they'll start asking for that server as well. You've just made that waiter look indispensable to the owner. The server will be grateful and take good care of you.

10. If you can't afford to leave a tip, you can't afford to eat in the restaurant. Servers could be giving 20 to 40 percent to the busboys, bartenders, or hostess.

11. Always examine the check. Sometimes large parties are unaware that a gratuity has been added to the bill, so they tip on top of it. Waiters "facilitate" this error. It's dishonest, it's wrong-and I did it all the time.

12. If you want to hang out, that's fine. But increase the tip to make up for money the server would have made if he or she had had another seating at that table.

13. Never, ever come in 15 minutes before closing time. The cooks are tired and will cook your dinner right away. So while you're chitchatting over salads, your entrances will be languishing under the heat lamp while the dishwasher is spraying industrial-strength , carcinogenic cleaning solvents in their immediate vicinity.

From Waiter Rant: Thanks for the Tip-Confessions of a Cynical Waiter by The Waiter (Ecco/HarperCollins )

Thursday, December 17, 2009

Self Help - Hoteling Tips - Part 1

13 Things Your Waiter Won't Tell You

Waiters share insider secrets about restaurants -- from tipping to what days to avoid dining out:

1. Avoid eating out on holidays and Saturday nights. The sheer volume of customers guarantees that most kitchens will be pushed beyond their ability to produce a high-quality dish.

2. There are almost never any sick days in the restaurant business. A busboy with a kid to support isn't going to stay home and miss out on $100 because he's got strep throat. And these are the people handling your food.

3. When customers' dissatisfaction devolves into personal attacks, adulterating food or drink is a convenient way for servers to exact covert vengeance. Some waiters can and do spit in people's food.

4. Never say "I'm friends with the owner." Restaurant owners don't have friends. This marks you as a clueless poseur the moment you walk in the door.

5. Treat others as you want to be treated. (Yes, people need to be reminded of this.)

6. Don't snap your fingers to get our attention. Remember, we have shears that cut through bone in the kitchen.

Tuesday, December 15, 2009

Self Help Stress Mantra

Guide on How to Manage Stress

Stress Management is more than anger management and relaxation. It is self management. There are many different ways to manage stress. I have compiled the various stress management techniques that are simple and most effective to follow and practice. Please feel free to use as many as you can, keeping an open mind, so you can have a collection of techniques that are the most effective for you.

1. Feel Good about your Self

If you want to bring down your level of stress level in a matter of minutes, these techniques will help you. Use them as needed to feel better quickly; practice them regularly over time and gain even greater benefits.

Deep Breathing from the Abdomen
Having a dose of Laughter
Progressive Muscular Relaxation
Listening to light music
Practicing Yoga
Aerobic Exercises
Creative Visualization

2. Take Care of Body

When we're stressed, we don't always take care of our bodies, which can lead to even more stress. Here are some important ways to take care of yourself and keep stress levels lower.

Eat Healthy low fats â€" high protein meals
Have six to eight hours of regular sleep
Exercise regularly
Develop a Hobby
Have healthy Sex Life

3. Develop the Right Attitude

Attitude plays a great role in managing stress. Much of your experience of stress has a lot to do with your attitude and the way you perceive your life's events. Here are some resources to help you maintain a stress-relieving attitude.

Let go your Ego
Have a Optimistic approach to life
Do not react under pressure
Stop Worrying about things not in your control
Accept that everything cannot be perfect
Find an opportunity in every problem
Say good things to your self â€" affirmations
Have a health sense of humour

4. Develop the Right Environment

Having ambiance and pleasant environment make stress management very easy. Your physical and emotional surroundings can impact your stress levels in subtle but significant ways. Here are several ways you can change your atmosphere and less your stress.

Clutter free home, office and working desk
Green and Clean surrounding
Light instrumental music
Motivational Posters
Words of Wisdom

5. Short Tips for Busy People

Busy People add a lot of stress to their already stressed life. People who may have more stressors in their lives is because they have more activity in their lives, and less time to devote to stress management. If you're a busy person, these resources can help you to manage stress efficiently in a short amount of time, and eliminate some of what's causing you stress in the first place.

Time Management Tips
Communication Skills
Listening Skills
Managing Priorities
Enhancing Team Work
Enhancing People Skills

Tuesday, December 8, 2009

Self Help Mantra For Peace Of Mind - Part 3

10 Principles For Peace of Mind - Part 3

8. Meditate Regularly :

Meditation calms the mind and gets rid of disturbing thoughts. This is thehighest state of peace of mind. Try and experience it yourself. If youmeditate earnestly for half an hour everyday, your mind will tend to becomepeaceful during the remaining twenty-three and half-hours. Your mind willnot be easily disturbed as it was before. You would benefit by graduallyincreasing the period of daily meditation. You may think that this willinterfere with your daily work. On the contrary, this will increase yourefficiency and you will be able to produce better results in less time.

9. Never Leave The Mind Vacant:

An empty mind is the devil's workshop. All evil actions start in the vacantmind. Keep your mind occupied in something positive, something worthwhile .Actively follow a hobby. Do something that holds your interest. You mustdecide what you value more: money or peace of mind. Your hobby, like socialwork or religious work, may not always earn you more money, but you willhave a sense of fulfillment and achievement. Even when you are restingphysically, occupy yourself in healthy reading or mental chanting of God'sname.

10. Do Not Procrastinate And Never Regret :

Do not waste time in protracted wondering " Should I or shouldn't I?" Days,weeks, months, and years may be wasted in that futile mental debating. Youcan never plan enough because you can never anticipate all futurehappenings. Value your time and do the things that need to be done. It doesnot matter if you fail the first time. You can learn from your mistakes andsucceed the next time. Sitting back and worrying will lead to nothing.Learn from your mistakes, but do not brood over the past. DO NOT REGRET.Whatever happened was destined to happen only that way. Why cry over spiltmilk?

Think Positive !!!

Monday, December 7, 2009

Self Help Mantra For Peace Of Mind - Part 2

10 Principles For Peace of Mind - Part 2

5. Change Yourself According To The Environment :

If you try to change the environment single-handedly, the chances are youwill fail. Instead, change yourself to suit your environment. As you dothis, even the environment, which has been unfriendly to you, willmysteriously change and seem congenial and harmonious.

6. Endure What Cannot Be Cured :

This is the best way to turn a disadvantage into an advantage. Every day weface numerous inconveniences, ailments, irritations, and accidents that arebeyond our control... If we cannot control them or change them, we mustlearn to put up with these things. We must learn to endure them cheerfully.Believe in yourself and you will gain in terms of patience, inner strengthand will power.

7. Do Not Bite Off More Than You Can Chew :

This maxim needs to be remembered constantly. We often tend to take moreresponsibilities than we are capable of carrying out. This is done tosatisfy our ego. Know your limitations. . Why take on additional loads thatmay create more worries? You cannot gain peace of mind by expanding yourexternal activities. Reduce your material engagements and spend time inprayer, introspection and meditation. This will reduce those thoughts inyour mind that make you restless. Uncluttered mind will produce greaterpeace of mind.

Thursday, December 3, 2009

Self Help Mantra For Peace Of Mind

10 Principles For Peace of Mind

1. Do Not Interfere In Others' Business Unless Asked.
Most of us create our own problems by interfering too often in others'affairs. We do so because somehow we have convinced ourselves that our wayis the best way, our logic is the perfect logic and those who do notconform to our thinking must be criticized and steered to the rightdirection, our direction. This thinking denies the existence ofindividuality and consequently the existence of God.. God has created eachone of us in a unique way. No two human beings can think or act in exactlythe same way. All men or women act the way they do because God within themprompts them that way. Mind your own business and you will keep your peace.

2. Forgive And Forget :
This is the most powerful aid to peace of mind. We often develop illfeelings inside our heart for the person who insults us or harms us. Wenurture grievances. This in turn results in loss of sleep, development ofstomach ulcers, and high blood pressure. This insult or injury was doneonce, but nourishing of grievance goes on forever by constantly rememberingit. Get over this bad habit. Life is too short to waste in such trifles.Forgive,20Forget, and march on. Love flourishes in giving and forgiving.

3. Do Not Crave For Recognition :

This world is full of selfish people. They seldom praise anybody withoutselfish motives. They may praise you today because you are in power, but nosooner than you are powerless, they will forget your achievement and willstart finding faults in you. Why do you wish to kill yours lf in strivingfor their recognition? Their recognition is not worth the aggravation. Doyour duties ethically and sincerely.

4. Do Not Be Jealous :
We all have experienced how jealousy can disturb our peace of mind. Youknow that you work harder than your colleagues in the office, but sometimesthey get promotions; you do not. You started a business several years ago,but you are not as successful as your neighbor whose business is only oneyear old. There are several examples like these in everyday life. Shouldyou be jealous? No. Remember everybody's life is shaped by his/her destiny,which has now become his/her reality. If you are destined to be rich,nothing in the world can stop you. If you are not so destined, no one canhelp you either. Nothing will be gained by blaming others for yourmisfortune. Jealousy will not get you anywhere; it will only take away yourpeace of mind.

Tuesday, December 1, 2009

Self Help - Management Tips

Five (5) good management characteristics:

A good boss knows how to delegate responsibilities. Some managers are too hands-on when it comes to managing their staff. This kind of manager usually performs part of the job and leaves the problem to his subordinates for them to solve. A good way to delegate duties is to let your people complete their work and refrain from doing their jobs for them. Interfering with their jobs means you do not trust their work. As a manager, it is your responsibility to develop the skills of your people so they can become future managers like you.

A good boss knows how to support his subordinates. Employees are expected to encounter daily problems as they perform their work. It is the responsibility of their manager to help them get around in solving these problems. However, managers must teach their staff to solve their crisis especially if it is within their level. Do not let your staff make you the go-to-person even on petty things. Do not allow them to make you their nanny and require you to solve their booboos.

A good manager gives credit to a job well done. Bad managers not only steal ideas from their staff but also demand credit for. It is a mistake for managers to feel threatened when his staff show superlative performance. In fact, credit will be given to the manager every time their staff perform effectively and efficiently. In short, a confident manager knows how to recognize performing staff and credits their outstanding work all the time.

A good manager is not assertive. Traditional managers are very particular with authority. They feel they should dominate everyone who is below them. They think they are superior to their staff in terms of brain power. Ideally, a good manager should look at his staff as business partners because they are your soldiers that will help you accomplish your management goals. Therefore, you must listen to their suggestions (or even complaints) and agree with it if acceptable.

A good manager treats his staff equally. Treat your staff as if they are your own children. They have different personalities and different talents. Some of them are performers and some of them may be the black sheep of the team. You cannot hand-pick the performers and disregard the lazybones. Whatever the type of species they may have, your job as their manager is to utilized their skills and put their talents on the right perspective.