How to Join the Right Gym - Part 1

How to Join the Right Gym 

Selecting a gym can be time-consuming at best, and downright annoying at worst. We've got some tips that can help you find a good match.

You're ready to boost your exercise regime by getting a gym membership, but how do you find a club that's right for you? Before you ever set foot on a treadmill, you may have to navigate a sea of aggressive salespeople and a ridiculously complex fee structure. 

But the benefits of gym membership are worth it, if you've chosen well. Arm yourself with these tips before you sign on the dotted line. 

Gym philosophy

Look for a club with a genuine interest in helping you achieve your health and fitness goals over the long term. Beware of the money mill, grind 'em in, grind 'em out facilities that lose interest in you the minute you've signed up and paid for a year.

Trust your instincts : If it seems like the salesperson is only interested in getting your signature on a contract, then you may want to look elsewhere.

To Be Continued......

How to Resign Gracefully - Part 5

Warnings

Allowing a boss you have disliked to needle you into insulting him or her will end badly. You don't want to end up being escorted off the premises by security. Don't give in to the temptation to say what you really think if it's negative.

Some bosses don't take kindly to you being "the decider." Be sure you can truly afford to walk away from your job that day, because sometimes the supervisor takes it very personally that you are leaving, tell you there's no need to give notice, and instruct you to leave immediately. You will be the best judge of this, so do your best to assess if your boss is one of these people - but be aware, sometimes, you just can't predict what anyone will do. Re-read your employment contract - you must be aware of all the company's and your own termination options. If there is no formal employment contract, familiarize yourself with the default provisions of your state/provincial law.

Be physically prepared to walk away that day: before resigning, save to disk or email to a private account anything you need and have the right to take such as contact information for clients, suppliers or other references; work samples; a list of projects you worked on, etc. [Keep in mind, much of the information and other items you had access to while employed are frequently proprietary and owned by the company. Make certain it is within the bounds of your contract and the law before you take this advice].

When considering a counter-offer, honestly evaluate why you want to leave - and protect yourself. While a raise might be nice, it might not solve other issues that require either a promotion (if your job advancement has stalled) or a transfer to another group (if you have personality conflicts with your boss). You can protect yourself from being vindictively fired later by demanding that, for at least two years, you stop being an "at will" employee and can only be fired "for cause."

A counter-offer is sometimes made because the employer has no one else available who is able to do your job. If that's the case, and you take the counter-offer, they will probably ask you to train others to take over your position. You may end up unwittingly training a replacement, only to find that the next change is not on your terms.

A counter-offer (if it's a raise only) may be an acknowledgment that you are being underpaid. (It may also be that your employer realizes that an investment of more money in you now will save them the expense of training and lost production while a replacement is trained and brought up to speed.) If you're being brought up to a proper pay level only under threat of leaving, you will likely have to face salary negotiations (or resigning) again in the future.

Be aware of any types of benefits you may be eligible for. If you are about to be laid off, you may have a severance package, or the option to collect unemployment benefits. These can be very handy if you have not secured a new job. Resigning from a position may disqualify you from receiving anything. It may be better in some cases to receive these benefits while looking for your next position.

DO NOT get into a complaint session with your co-workers before you leave. Behave as if you were returning as normal, and every negative thing you say will get back to the boss or to the person you complain about. Again, you never know when these people will resurface in your career. If you have to have a venting session, do it only with one very trusted co-worker. Save it for after you are gone - and definitely, do it away from the office.

Don't let your emotions get to you.

Concluded

How to Resign Gracefully - Part 4

Tips

Remember that there are very few who are so free as those who have nothing to lose - but it won't serve you well in the future if you go shooting your mouth off just because you're on your way out. It won't kill you to make nice for two weeks, because you're getting out, and soon the entire experience will be behind you.

The jerk you leave behind today may well end up being your boss again - or perhaps even worse, your underling - in the future. And remember, too, that sometimes those jerks are oblivious to the fact that they're not well liked. If you are remembered as someone who was positive and generous in the past, you may well be greasing the wheels to a great future as this former boss of yours who is now your new boss puts you (the friendly face he remembers from before) ahead of the strangers in the new position. This may facilitate transfers to other branch offices, better assignments, and more.

Consider any counteroffer objectively and in depth. It may be wise to refuse any offers to stay with your current employer. Accepting a pay raise or other bonus after threatening to leave can cast you in a negative light with co-workers and the company as a whole. It can also make you seem indecisive and of questionable loyalty. Always keep a record of the offer in case you come back to the company in the future.

After informing your supervisor, be sure to personally tell other managers or key employees with whom you have worked that you have resigned. Say it in a way that "thanks" the person for helping you develop your career. "I don't know if you've heard, but I am resigning to take a position at another company. Before I leave I wanted to be sure to let you know how much I've enjoyed working with you." These people may leave for other jobs in the future and you want them to have positive memories of you. Who knows when they can impact your next career move.

To Be Continued ....

How to Resign Gracefully - Part 3

6

Emphasize the positive. Be honest, but polite. If the boss asks you if he or she had anything to do with your decision, and was a factor, it's best to rely on tact and diplomacy to make an honest answer palatable. In other words, you won't help yourself by saying, "Yes, you're a lousy supervisor and I (or anyone) would have been way better," (even if it's true). You can be truthful without being cruel: "It was a factor, but not the entire reason. I felt our working styles and approaches just weren't a great fit, and that we never meshed as well as I wished we had. Still, the overall experience here has been positive; and with this opportunity, I feel excited to have new challenges."

7

Have a copy of your letter of resignation in hand. Make your letter brief, non-confrontational and professional. An example: "Dear Mr. Spacely: It has been my honor to work for Spacely Sprockets, Inc. This letter is to notify you that I will be leaving to accept a new position with another company as of [a date which is AT LEAST two weeks from the date of your conversation and letter]. Please accept my thanks for our association, and best regards to you and the entire company for the future. Sincerely, George Jetson."

8

Shake hands, smile, and thank your boss. Whether your departure is to relocate, to take a better job, or just to get away from this guy, show some class when you're walking out the door. Shake hands, thank your soon-to-be-former supervisor (yay!) for "everything," and leave. Go to your work station and stay there for at least 10 minutes. Now you can go blab it to everybody, but don't rub it in your boss's nose - be classy and simply confirm that you will be leaving.

To Be Continued ...

How to Resign Gracefully - Part 2

3

 A moment of your time?

Ask your boss for an appointment to discuss an important matter. Poking your head in and asking for a moment of his or her time will do - just be respectful of the fact that your supervisor has a job to do, and may not be able to drop everything at the precise moment you are prepared to spring this news on him or her. If there is too much going on, you will only add to your his or her hassles, so if it's at all possible, wait for a time when your boss will have a few moments to focus on your news.

4

Be prepared, direct, and polite. Rehearsing privately will help you be ready when your supervisor has you in to talk. Most managers are extremely busy and they will appreciate your direct approach, forgoing the temptation to "cushion the blow," "find the right way to say this," or otherwise beat around the bush. You might say something like:

"I've been considering my options here for some time, and I've decided it's time for me to move on. I am grateful for the opportunities I've found here, but I must give my two weeks' notice."

OR... "I need to let you know that I have been offered a new position at another company. I have really enjoyed working here, but I need to give you my two weeks' notice as of today. Does it work for you if my last day is [whatever two weeks from then is?"

5

Be prepared to discuss. Chances are you've been working with this boss for some time, and whatever your reasons are for leaving, she or he may have some questions. Or your boss may value you much more than you realized, and make a counteroffer. Being polite and dignified about your resignation could make this possible. You will need to consider in advance whether you would stay for a pay raise, increased benefits, a promotion, or other incentives. This would be a prime negotiating opportunity, so be prepared for it, and know your own bottom line. If staying is an option, what would make you open to it? Check the warnings below, though, because counter-offers can have some serious downsides.

To Be Continued....

How to Resign Gracefully - Part 1

It's time for you to make a change, be it a new career path or simply a new challenge. The procedure for resigning is simple enough: give notice, preferably in advance. But if you don't want to burn any bridges, thereby creating obstacles to future opportunities, you must be especially careful and considerate. Resigning is easy, but resigning gracefully is not. This article specifically covers several ways a person can make their resignation as smooth and as grudge-free as possible.

Steps

1

Keep it to yourself. Once you've made the decision, don't go blabbing it all over the company until you have notified your immediate supervisor. Give her or him time to absorb and process the information. If the company makes an attractive counter-offer, it will be awkward if you have already announced your plans to coworkers.

2

Plan to give notice. If you want to leave under the best possible terms, don't leave your employer high and dry, scrambling to cover your position. Give at least two weeks notice (or the minimum notice specified in your employment contract if applicable) so that your boss can prepare to have others cover for you, or have time to groom a replacement.

To Be Continued ....

7 Reasons To say Good Morning To Your Co-Workers - Part 2

5. It is free.

6. Acknowledging the mere presence of someone is interpersonal communications 101. Do not YOU want to be noticed? You might tell yourself otherwise, but at the end of the day, we all want to be recognized.

7. Saying 'Good Morning' makes things less awkward when you inevitably have to address your co-worker later in the day. Start the day off on the right foot and avoid potential stresses later in the day.

According to Psychology Today, early risers are more agreeable than those who prefer the P.M. hours. Morning people also have more stable personalities and lower levels of aggression, supporting the idea that serotonin is involved in keeping both moods and circadian rhythms regular. Gives new meaning to "You Snooze, You Lose."

So if someone is avoiding saying hello in the A.M., you just got a sneak peek into their psychological world.

The start of each new day has a mystique about it. Think about it - most religions have morning services, a sunrise continues to serve as a generic symbol of hope, and a good cup of morning coffee is still (and rightly so) worshiped.

Whether we like it or not, we all partake in some semblance of this daily routine, no matter who we are, what we do or where we work. Making the words 'Good Morning' part of that routine is part of the process to Make Work Better. If we cannot make even the most measly effort with our co-workers, it says a lot more about you than you might care to admit.

Concluded

7 Reasons To say Good Morning To Your Co-Workers - Part 1

Joe and Stacy work next to each other. They sit no more than five feet apart. Even though they often arrive at work before the rest of the team, there is no communication between them. 

• Only silence.
• No morning greeting. 
• No acknowledgment that they are sharing the same office oxygen.

Saying 'Good Morning' should not be difficult. Yet, there is an increasing trend, almost a rebellion, against saying these two simple words to our co-workers. It is not as we were required to salute, bow, kneel or courtesy. Even a casual nod and mumble would be a lot better than the nothing that is now occurring at far too many work sites.

Do not become part of this alarming trend. Experience the power of 'Good Morning.'

1. It maintains the standards of basic civility that we are all entitled to at work. Like 'Please' and 'Thank You', these two little words also go a long way towards improving communication and the overall atmosphere.

2. 'Good Morning' humanizes our co-workers. We are real people, not just cogs in a pointlessly spinning wheel. Show some humanity.

3. Provides for a more democratic environment, where everyone from the CEO to the mail clerk get to share in a friendly two-second exchange.

4. It is quick (and relatively painless). If it is painful, you should probably be looking for a new job or scheduling time for some serious self-reflection.

To Be Continued....

10 Money Minders for a Holiday ! - Part 2

5. Ask your banker ... all about cash advance, ATM, foreign purchase and foreign exchange rate policies and fees.

6. Find out .... the number you can reach your bank or credit card company on while you are abroad. The 800 number listed on the back of your card may not work from foreign location.

7. Check for currency conversion rates ... of your credit card companies. In that case you can find the most economical card on which to place your foreign purchases.

8. Using the ATM card ... is also a good idea. The ATM will issue money in local currency. but better check: come banks charge a high usage fee for their ATMs. Although even high ATM fees may be less than others will charge for currency exchanges.

9. Exchange your currency at ... the bank;s wholesale exchange rate. yes; there;s something like that!

10. Best currency conversion option is ... to carry dollars. It's easier to exchange.

Concluded

10 Money Minders for a Holiday ! - Part 1

Its Holiday Time, but being strapped for cash is a traveller's worst nightmare. Read on how to keep it bay!

A holiday is an escape to somewhere your worried can't reach you. Yes, that's the word - worry. Fair enough! But what if you land yourself in one while travelling? What if your credit card isn't accepted and you aren't getting a decent exchange rate for your native currency? Now that we have you worried before you have face it, we have also got you a check list :

1. Take along your major credit cards....

Make sure they are really credit cards and not just debit cards with a credit card company logo on them. many locations require a credit card and will not accept a debit card, as they may have limited use on your travel.

2. Notify your credit card company ....  of your trip before you leave. The unfamiliar spending patterns might cause them to suspect that the card is being sued fraudulently and delay your approvals. Further they will explain many of the services that they can provide while you are on your trip.

3. Inform your bank ... of your trip too, so that arrangements can be made to pay bills that will come due while you are gone.

4. Confirm your credit card company .... if your PIN number will work in the countries you are visiting. They can also issue you another PIN number, if your current PIN is unacceptable in the foreign bank system.

To Be Continued.....  

How to battle loneliness after a breakup !

1. Don’t indulge in self-pity – that’s most important. Make a conscious effort to appear confident and keep smiling. Get down to watching your favourite programmes on TV. Spend some time re-connecting with yourself and regaining parts of yourself that you may have lost or been neglecting lately. 

2. Visit friends and family – they can be a great comfort after a breakup. Catch up with them and allow them to take care of you and keep you company when you’re feeling down. 

3. Take a break and get out of town for a few days- A new environment will allow you to meet new people whom you might make friends with. 

4. Pick up a new hobby- Now could be a good time to do something you’ve always thought of doing. Take dance lessons. Start a blog... Before you know it, you’ll forget all about that old what’s his (or her) name. 

How to break away from an Affair ...! - Part 2

DON’T DISCUSS MUCH 

In a scenario where both people realise that the relationship is heading nowhere, a break-up will come as a relief. But in a case that is otherwise, it is the duty of the one moving on to accept blame. Keep talking about how the relationship has no future or how it has lost its charm without blaming the person or accusing him/her. 

KEEP REPEATING IT 

The other person is likely to talk about how ‘we had a good time the other day’ etc. Agree with her/him, but talk about how the good times are few and farther away in frequency. Keep the focus on ‘now’ and ‘I’. How ‘you’ feel differently ‘now’ or how ‘your’ needs have changed. 

Any other discussion will lead to counter accusations and escalate into anger. In case it does, having a neutral party helps as they will bring the conversation back on track. It is important that you don’t dent the self-esteem of the other person by picking personality flaws. In the same vein, don’t blame parents or interfering friends. 

And above all, don’t get angry. It is expected that the person still emotionally involved will be hurt and resort to anger and emotional blackmail. But the other should stand firm in the decision. Don't waver and go back again and again as this will unnecessarily prolong the end and make the other person feel like he/she is being used. Every time your partner wants to talk about why you’re breaking up, repeat your stand even at the risk of being crude. 

Hopefully by the next morning, your partner will begin to see the light. 

BREAK IT GENTLY 

If the girlfriend/boyfriend is excessively emotionally dependent on you, you can cut off ties gradually. While informing them that the relationship is over, reinforce that you will always be friends and that you can be depended upon in the time of need. 

In extreme cases, you may need to put space in between you. Saying that you need your space before announcing the break-up will also help prepare ground. But remember to actually reduce your interactions if you want to send out the right signals. 

After the break up, call up once in a while to check how they are doing. But make the agreement contractual. In case you can’t speak when they call, promise to call back at a more convenient hour and keep your word. Make the calls less frequent as time goes by. 

Avoiding calls or making excuses will again open the door for accusations and fights. 

WHEN SMS-ING IS NECESSARY 

The method of SMS can be used when all other lines of communication broke down. Her ex avoided her calls and postponed all plans of conversation, she finally sent him an SMS saying it was over. 

EXPERTSPEAK 

• Sometimes, a person has moved on but is afraid of telling the partner and taking responsibility for his/her actions or of the emotional consequences.The person may then act in an offensive manner to drive the partner to take the final step and absolve him/herself of blame. 

• Sometimes it is necessary to end a relationship abruptly and impersonally. Especially if the other person is clingy and talking has not lead to anything but emotional outbursts. 

Source : TNN 

Concluded

How to break away from an Affair ...! - Part 1

SORRY, IT’S OVER! ..How to break away from an affair

When you have got to walk out, you’ve got to walk out. But while doing it, don’t be an emotional infant

Of the 50 ways to leave your lover, SMSing, ‘Make a new plan,’ is not the most sensitive. Breaking up (or declining a prospect gracefully) is never easy, but with careful planning and a bit of sensitivity, you can lessen the trauma of heartbreak. 

PREPARE THE GROUND 

If the case is such that one person has moved on in the relationship and the other is still emotionally attached, start by preparing the ground. Give the person a heads-up by saying you want to discuss something serious and invite them to a dinner. The plan should be immediate, to erode any possibility of suspense on the part of the partner. Make sure the venue is some place you can spend time at. You can’t expect to talk about what is wrong with the relationship that you are ending by the time a burger and coffee arrive at a fast-food joint. 

TAKE A FRIEND 

Get an objective third party involved. Take the permission of your partner to bring along a neutral friend or family member. If he or she objects, you can also suggest they invite a friend or relative from their side so that they don’t feel cornered. The presence of such a person will keep the discussion on track and stop it from escalating into a blame-game or reaching an emotional crescendo. And if emotions do run high, it is the duty of the third party to ask the partner, who is breaking up, to leave the venue and sit with the other one. They should listen to them vent their anger and re-emphasize that the problem does not lie with them personally.

To Be Continued .....

Communicating With Kids !

Understanding your children's needs is an important step in understanding how you need to communicate with them.

As your kids grow, the way he/she communicates with you changes. Here are a few challenges a parent faces while trying to communicate with his/her child and how the parent can rectify these communication problem :

6-12 age group 

In this age group, kids are aware yet very curious and inquisitive. They have complete faith and trust in what their parents say and do not challenge what is spoken. A parent of 13-year-old says, "Being a parent of a kid belonging to 6 to 12 years of age is most challenging as during this time the child is still forming opinions and trusts you for everything. A child does not understand etiquette and concepts like how we need to react to different situations differently. At this stage, they also begin questioning subjects difficult to understand like God."

A psychiatrist doctor says, "In this age group, kids are forming good and bad behavioral traits through reinforcement and reactions they get from adults, particularly parents."

13-18 age group 

In this age group, the child starts facing typical teenage problems. Sometimes he / she is childlike and sometimes expects to be treated as an adult. So the child is little confused during this stage. Also, attraction to opposite sex begins to occur during this age. So parents should be available as a support system. 

The doctor says, "Kids also face a lot of exam and career related stress. Kids during this time are sexually mature but emotionally aren't. Though the child is more or less disciplined during these ages, the fact that they are slightly more depression-prone makes it a difficult age to handle. Also kids might take to smoking, excessive Internet or porn watching at these ages, so parents need to handle that."

Source : Times Wellness