Don't Argue.....Discuss!
Discussions can be healthy, since they have the potential to build relationships and result in a "win" for everyone. On the other hand, arguments are rarely good. Why? They are forceful attempts to change another person’s point of view, and thus result in a "winner" and a "loser."
Arguments always cause some damage, even if you "win." The next time you find yourself involved in a conflict of opinion, use these guidelines to make it a DISCUSSION”resolving the issue while building the relationship.
Welcome the Disagreement. The other person may have a perspective you haven’t considered, so be thankful for it. Maybe this is your chance to be corrected before making a mistake.
Distrust Your First Inclination to Defend Yourself. Defensiveness is often a natural reaction. But be careful”when you justify yourself, it’s hard to change your position later. Plus, you’ll miss the benefit of the other person’s ideas.
Control Your Temper. Getting angry always makes communication harder, not easier. So simmer down before you blow your top.
Listen First. Give your "opponent" a chance to talk. Don’t defend or debate. Build bridges of understanding, not barriers of misunderstanding.
To Be Continued....
by Dr. John C. Maxwell
